pitter patter // this is the end

i know why i am here

and somehow/somewhere along the way i gave into a fear

i have spent the last 3 hours listening/watching to live performances by Janis Joplin and The Doors

it screeches and it moans

it rambles and it spits

it is reflective. it is somber.

I am here to sing rock n roll songs

i am here to share my faults and anguish

through music. through song. through words and parables.

there is a pushing back from the ether when we find that one thing that can really fuck with the all of it

for me that is making time for routinely entertaining

for myself first and then with community

from one space to the next

time after time

i am not afraid

i can’t keep this Janis stardust in anymore